life is being a bitch right now.
and so is everyone else around me, perhaps I am the bitch that's making everyone's life miserable.
you know what? I just want to lock myself in the room and cry myself to sleep.
we're really hardly ever sober.
when is the world going to become awake, when is everyone going to get one tight slap and finally wake-up?
WHEN?
And why is my world and life filled with questions, open-ended and multiple choices.
why can't it just be simple - yes and no, blac and noir.
why am I so intolerable. Am I going to tear down my life myself?
Was it never others, is it true that I am the only crazy one screaming and blaming, pointing fingers at others, not seeing that I am the one who is indeed fucking wrong in the first place.
Are my parents and family members pointing fingers at each other too? Is this why I seem to live in world war 3 with myself every day? Does anybody else out there feel like it's a war with ourselves.
To choose right from wrong, knowing the answer,but not doing the right thing.
Pre-menstrual syndrome? I don't think so.
But I hope so, for fear that i am losing my sanity and having to check myself into therapy.
I know there's something wrong with me.
But I can't afford being mentally unstable.
I can't bear to hurt those around me, but I must, andIi emphasize, MUST learn self-control and resilience, not to cause self-harm, thinking no one sees anything behind closed doors.
Man, am I wrong, God sees all things.
And I have to start trusting in Him.
Weakness.
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