It's just Celandine

Not everything in this world can be understood by us, nor should it be.
I still don't understand how you managed to steal my heart when i guarded it so fiercely. I tried to stay away from loving you, and this time it's so different. Why did you walk out? After all that i trusted you with - my secrets, my fears, my everything. Where have you been, it's not the same after you left, it's so different. I didn't have to pretend with you, i felt real, i didn't have to pretend, didn't have to lie. I was me, you were you. We were human, if even just for a little while. I loved, I lost, and now everything i do is a hollow, sadistic memory of you. The moon, it reminds me of the nights spent, rain reminds me of us just sitting in the playground trying to wait for heaven's tears to fall. You remember, don't you? And cats, we used to see them all the time - i tried to coax them to me and you'd laugh and call me silly. Markers, which were the cause of the countless pen wars, the riot of colours which covered every inch of skin on our arms, hands, necks and faces. Phonecalls we shared, birthdays we had, countdowns we stayed up to. Promises we made, tears you caused and wiped away. Secrets only your ears have heard, love only you have written on my hands, feelings you have carved on my heart and mind. Only you grabbed my hands with such a mix of great care, friendship and mischief that is enough to leave my skin pulsating where there was contact. My best friend. I'll never forget the way we met, enemies at first. But just as man comes from dust and returns to dust, we'll part, broken and as foes. We were once, perhaps love. Once, once upon a time, in a faraway land, there lived two people. Happily, never after.

You'll never know, cos I never show, what I feel inside.